Welcome to Adulthood

“Miss?” My head snaps in the direction of the reception desk where a curly blonde woman in a blue aviator uniform complete with 1950s spectacles sits. She glances in my direction as I stand, others around me in the waiting room … Continue reading

I Wish I Could Be Drunk All The Time.. With No Consequences

I love me when I’m drunk. 

I’m suave. 

charming

sweet

interesting

intelligent 

and I ALWAYS know what to say

I don’t feel so much pain 

I don’t feel so anxious. 

I feel free

and perfect

and pretty. 

It’s made sober so damn fucking difficult. 

Everything I do now is followed by wow this would be 10x better drunk. 

It’s like I get to sit back and give control to someone else. 

something else.

It takes over and gives me a break. 

It sooths my aching 

muscles 

heart  

soul. 

It tells me to relax and sleep

It gives me the opportunity to leave and never return. 

But I know I have to hold on to the string. 

just for now. 

One though

One day I will be able to let go

fall into the abyss

and fly.

In Medio

I’m not going to lie. 

There are good days.

And there are bad days.

Then sometimes,

There’s inbetween days

Fight away the dark 

Force the light;

And it just makes me so tired.

Too tired to eat. 

Too tired to sleep. 

Too tired to do makeup.

Hair 

Or Homework.

Too tired to check messages

The weather

Or the oven

Remaining motionless

Every piece on guard

Don’t touch

Every touch a knife 

Get away

Have to do this alone

 

War Inside 

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